I am so sad. Just a few days ago I posted a video by Eydie Gorme, whose music was a huge part of my childhood. Now, she has died.

Eydie Gorme has died, age 84, today, August 10, 2013. She was one of my teachers, one of those great vocalists given to me by my aunt; I sang along with Eydie, and this was one of my favorites. I loved her so. What an entertainer. She knew how to sell a song.

And, here again, another of her genius performances.

Thank you, dear, dear Eydie. How I wish I had someone in my life who understood this history we shared; who knew what you meant to me; who got the resonances and connections. I don’t think I can cope with this overwhelming alone-ness I have been feeling. I just can’t cope with all the loss anymore. I don’t suppose posting “EYDIE GORME has died – someone please hold me” on Craigslist would get me any closer to finding someone who’s interested in more than a dickpic and other things I haven’t got and won’t do. God I’m a pathetic miserable failed piece of shit.