I have read eight books about which I need to write, but, it may be a while. I am not feeling so well.
I’ve been dealing with what presents as a dermatological problem since January. It started the day of the inauguration (or, I noticed it then) on my upper right arm and has now spread over my entire body from the neck down. It’s been a nightmare of trying to get a referral and find a doctor who is covered by my insurance and gives a damn.
I think I’ve finally found one, but they are flummoxed by whatever it is I have, very kindly explaining that neither they nor anyone they’ve consulted has seen anything quite like this. I am, as ever, unique.
There are a couple of potential diagnoses but nothing definite — they are mostly shots in the dark — and to complicate it further, my insurance doesn’t cover the lab these doctors use and prefer, and the lab it does cover is either very slow or — well, here’s the thing, the results from the latest round of biopsies have still not come back, having been delayed for some reason now almost four weeks.
In addition, for about a month now, I’ve been having some digestive issues. It started as a minor, on and off sort of thing, but has in the past week become rather more intense, not quite like the episodes two and a half years ago that almost killed me and were never really diagnosed, but similar, and the cramping and nausea was so bad last night I had to lie on the floor in the bathroom to be close to the toilet.
To add to the fun, my sinuses are acting up, and I’ve been gagging awake at night in the very few hours I am able to sleep, and having a dry hacking cough the phlegm from which tastes and feels like when I used to smoke and get bronchitis regularly.
So, all in all, I am feeling very weak. And a little afraid about this conflation of illnesses and the inability of anyone to offer any sort of explanation for what is going on with my collapsing body.
Thus, I am just going to be reading for a while, because writing carefully and thoughtfully about the work of my dear authors (and all authors, to me, are dear) is not the respect and attention they deserve.
Okay dear ones, I am off. Going.