… the music is coming back …

Long, sad story ago … I used to sing all the time, sometimes, even, for other people, and sometimes, even, people enjoyed it. Then, music was ripped from my life. The piles and stacks and albums and music books and endless singing I did – yes, I was one of those who punctuated life with a soundtrack I made up as I went along – ended.

Now, slowly, it seems to be sneaking back into my world. I find myself singing again. Which, frankly, scares me. I left most of my music behind along with most everything else I owned and worked for, and the few CDs I had were – sadly – drowned in the flood that happened last year a few weeks after I’d moved into another new place. But, this morning, I found the “Lauren Kennedy: Songs of Jason Robert Brown” CD and though it swam in the flood, and its booklet and cover ruined, the CD played and I have been OBSESSING all morning on it.

I once sang “Letting You Go” – and if I ever sing again, I would include it. But, here is the perfection of Lauren Kennedy singing it with genius composer, Jason Robert Brown accompanying her.

I have been weepy all morning. Need I say that?

LETTING YOU GO by Jason Robert Brown

Sweeping up plaster
Mopping the floor
Washing the windows

Cleaning the closets
Closing the door

Filling the cracks
Out in the hall
Scraping the paint
Off of the wall
Changing the lock
Turning the key
Letting you go away from me.

Knowing it’s better
Here in my head
Doing the laundry

Washing the dishes
Making the bed

Nothing to fight
Nothing to choose
Maybe it’s good
Learning to lose
Maybe I’ll shine
Finally free
Letting you go away from me.

If I were smart,
If I were strong,
If I could just
Say I was wrong,
Say it was me –
Say I could move –
Make you believe
These things improve,
Could I forget
All of the cracks
Deep in the ground,
Under our tracks?
And if I could,
Then would you see
Or would you go away?
Would you go away…

Facing the facts
Watching the clock
Maybe you’ll change
Just down the block
And if you did,
Where would I be?
Letting you go away from me?

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