… zeit-bite me … I wanna say “bitches” but I can’t …he bitches …

(Today, your intrepid Zeit-Bites reporter must ASSAULT you with a 500 word intro about why he canNOT use the word “bitch” before he gets to the Bites of the Zeit about which he meant to write. Skip to the Bold Print headlines below if his semiotics and humanities bore you … but, you shouldNOT.)

I used to love the word “bitch”. I felt like I had earned it and owned it and thus – on occasion –  embraced it as agnominal badge of honor (and justification); you know, on those days when someone had really torqued me and I needed to rationalize my evisceration of them or their actions? The “Don’t mess with me, I’m a bitch” card? Ever done that?

Only, the thing is, the word is far too often applied in a subtly (or not so subtly) sexist manner, an assumption of denigration, the anger and annoyance implied in the word tarnished with an “oh it’s a WOMAN thing” sort of negative-energy. So, I had to stop using the word. Because I am a humanist and a philologist who believes with every visible and invisible atom of my soul-stuff that language matters.

Said belief and philosophy is a twisting, winding pathway, but one of its most important tenets – for me, and I don’t judge anyone who does not share this belief, but FOR ME – is living a life in which one cultivates the insight, empathy, and sensitivity to grow an awareness of the effect of one’s language-ing on others. It seemed clear to me from cultural and social media observation that ANY use of the word “bitch” was – at least by some people – affirming and approving an anti-female bias. When i say “some”, I mean far too many – and I wouldn’t stop using it if only bigots and haters were those to whom I refer, but the worry was (is) that even those who may not have recognized the effect of the frequent use of the word “bitch” in implicitly judgmental ways was having, or, even, those who would have been horrified (as was I) to discover the cultural biases it use seemed to approve.

I know there is an argument about victims of cultural bias taking back the language; but I have never been much convinced of that. On the few occasions I did use the word “faggot” in what was meant to be an “affirming” and “empowering” way – sorry, it still felt to me like I had bought into and taken on the chains of the oppressor-hater-class.

So, I can’t say “bitch” either. It’s oppressive. It’s ultimately anti-woman. Which makes it anti-human. Which, for me, makes it anti-language; because, again, in my complicated – and entirely personal – semiotical theory of life, language is about the communication and translation into linear physical reality of the Light and Love at our cores, and I don’t want – ever – to be a force of destruction of that love and light – even if the intent was inadvertent, my words misinterpreted, or the meaning of my language skewed by someone else’s contextualization.

So, no bitching.

Which is all a long apologia introductia to the things by which I have been struck today which seem to have in common the B-word. And so … here goes.

HERE SHE IS …

Miss America winner Nina DavuluriLast night was the Miss America Pageant. I watched only the first sixty minutes or so. I had things to do. Places to go. And, frankly, once the talent started and Chris Harrison announced the song being sung as belonging to the show “EVERYBODY CAN WHISTLE” – well, after wanting to kill myself and screaming at the television (and Tweeting), “ANYONE can whistle, you asshole, ANYONE!” I thought it best that I stop.

It was only later – much – that I learned Miss New York had won for the second year in a row and that her victory had started a tsunami of further asshole racist Tweets and commentaries. I’d go on – but here’s my friend, Miss Mary McCarthy in SPLICETODAY (Click Here to read) explaining what went on and what should be done.

How does this apply to my moratorium on the B-word? Because I want to call out the haters as “bitch-asses” – but, see … I can’t.

AND THERE HE IS …

Jonas NickNick Jonas turns 21 today. I have already gone on – far too long – about my willingness to become the JoBros bitch. Ah … see, there it is. (And here – CLICK HERE – here it was – a past entry with MORE naked JoBros pics! And, I hasten to add – one of my most popular entries – go figure.) And in that usage does indeed imply (promise, even) a level of subjugation and “on one’s knees” energy that is – well – just wrong. (But if you read this Nick or Joe – I’d still TOTALLY do it.)

AND THERE THEY ARE …

Jessica GifAnd too … my obsession with AMERICAN HORROR STORY and all things Jessica Lange has been frequently the topic of my posts. Now, add Patti LuPone to the mix and – well – and how does “bitch” fit in here? Read the article. They practically called Ms. LuPone one in thePatti-LuPone-2 first sentence – or, rather, implied that her reputation as one precedes her. READ IT HERE (I found it via Huffington Post). I loveLOVELOVE how Jessica Lange praises Ms. LuPone. Classy. AND THEY WERE BORN ONE DAY AFTER ONE ANOTHER? WHAT? And , as you can see from GIF above, Miss Lange used the word “bitch” in AHS – but, it was character driven, right?

AND SADLY, HERE I AM … NOT GOING …

bobbyAnd so, you see, “bitch” can sometimes have what seem to be okay uses. But, i guess, for me, not so much.  So, it would be INAPPROPRIATE and NOT OKAY for me to call myself a punk-ass bitch because I am so incredibly envious of all my friends and acquaintances who are getting to see Frederick’s own Bobby Steggert in Andrew Lippa’s BIG FISH on Broadway, right? Right. Another friend went this weekend and posted some pics – backstage with Bobby. Again, I say, how in the world did an actor grow up and train in Frederick during all the years I was teaching, directing and performing and we never, ever worked together here? Just my luck. Or, maybe, his luck. Here’s an interview (click here) with him on The Broadway Blog. EVERYONE SHOULD GO SEE THIS SHOW! (Read about it and get tickets here.)

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